I learn something new every day and today it is this:
When trying to advise a young person (or any person come to that) do not start with a negative. Point out the solution before you mention the problem it is aimed at addressing, because starting with the problem turns off ears, gets backs up and prevents the positive from either ever getting said or being listened to.
Why I didn’t realise this before I don’t know, but now I see that this is why I feel like I’ve constantly repeated myself with advice to my daughter on a certain issue for the past 7 years and she has never taken a blind bit of notice of me. I started with the negative each time and she never heard the advice I was giving out of love and concern for her, all she heard was the criticism and it hurt her and made her switch off.
It’s never too late to admit you’ve been wrong and to put the record straight and thankfully I realised today that by tackling things in a different way a problem sometimes becomes instantly solvable.