Arrived in true style via Miami and I can’t begin to tell how we got there I must be a true princess that’s all I can say.
Weather’s good humid, warm, sunny with pretty clouds dappling the sky… clouds make the sky more interesting when what you’re mostly doing is lying on your back looking at it. Relaxation by the bucket load!
We’re in a private serviced villa so no need to move or lift a finger, jacuzzi and pool out the back and beach a very short walk beyond. Everything’s been tested out and all meets with my approval.
Laid on lilos in the pool last night holding hands watching the stars listening to the waves on the beach, some creatures chirruping away and this (among other ‘songs with a message to chill out to’ prepared by my companion) playing softly in the background… bliss.
Can’t even describe how relaxed I feel, how lucky I am, how last year seems a million miles away, how healthy I feel and how happy I am that I started to make the changes in my life that were so necessary. I wouldn’t have done this, I wouldn’t have been here, I wouldn’t have felt this if I hadn’t taken that little step in April all I can think about now is how much more awesome is next summer going to be.
Heart’s full to brimming with good stuff for a change, head is clear for the first time ever, nothing matters, nothing. All is good, I can’t change the world but I can change the way I live and enjoy my time on it. My dad’s last words to me were “Don’t cry for me, I had a good life, I’m leaving with a smile on my face, just promise me that when it’s your time to go you will leave it laughing” … I feel like I’m going to be able to do that for him now. Not because of Nick, I know people will be thinking this is because I’ve got a lovely man who is treating me like a queen, it’s not that at all, that’s an aside and is something which could easily change, it’s beyond my control to stay with Nick or for him to always be this amazing that is something that I just have to enjoy and let happen… sail with it and what will be will be. No, it’s the way I feel about me and my life as me, Michelle, the mother of my children, that’s what has changed, that’s what has brought me to this feeling, just me and the changes I’ve made to turn how I view myself inside and out.