I have not seen my beloved Nicholas for a few days now as work got in the way of life as it has a nasty habit of doing. But tonight we reunite and I am so excited and happy to see him again I can not breathe if I think about it too much. This is the upside of temporary absence making the heart grow fonder and I love it.
I swear I’m like a 19 year old idiot, all giggly and warm and fuzzy and squealy and I totally love that I can still feel like that when 50 is beckoning furiously. I want to be like this when 60 is knocking on the door and 70 is trying to break in through the windows too and I will be because I’m going to make sure I am.
I have instructions… but before them I have to share today’s post from my other blog which sets the scene musically with the best upbeat love song ever to have graced the air waves… listen here and get excited about being in love, even if you’re not in love with a person romantically, be excited to have a chance to fall in love with life Love is in the Air
So the instructions given to me via third party are:
1. Pack a bag for three days. You will be leaving home at 5pm on Friday and not return until 12pm on Monday (this gave me heart failure as I have so much work to do but that’s been achieved now thanks to wonderful children and fab friends)
2. You will need outdoor clothes for cold weather but you’re not going skiing so don’t go that far
3. You will need indoor clothes for love, romance, posh food and maybe throw in a swim suit
4. You might need a passport so pack it but you might not need it, this is part of the suspense
5. Be ready at 5pm a chauffeur will pick you up and your adventure will begin
6. Leave all of your cares behind
That’s it. All I have to go on so I’m all packed, my best knickers and poshest frocks are in the case suitably sprtized with J’adore by Dior (my absolute fave perfume), passport’s in my handbag, heels and a counter’s worth of make up are in the case and I’m hoping that if I’m flying anywhere that Nick reunites with me this side of whatever body of water we’re flying over. I’ve missed him so much and can’t wait to see him, if I have to endure a long journey without him I’ll positively dive on him when I get wherever I’m going. I’m all waxed and tinted and pedi and manicured and the nails are revitalised from their chipped, split crafty selves to wonderfully painted elegant talons. Barry White is on the ipod and all is good with the world.
The daughter is in situ to guard the son and is having friends over for an anti valentine’s catch up weekend.
I swear if there is chocolate anywhere this weekend I’m all over that and I’m just so excited to be having a break away with my sweetheart, it’s been a while since I tore myself away from work and I’ve been flat out with business and teaching and my community project so I’m ready for some me time and some us time.
A year ago I would have scoffed at this romance thing, I think my fat unhealthy unhappy self didn’t feel worthy of this stuff and my emotionally damaged self was quite bitter, I hadn’t even realised that until I started this journey to find myself under the fat. I’m so liberated now, I’ve really lost so much more than the fat, I’ve lost the shackles of the fat psyche which might not affect everyone but were affecting me. I’m not sure if it comes from a life of disaster or a life of never feeling good enough to enjoy the things other people enjoyed and the development of a real cynicism. Maybe a combination of the two. But whatever, it’s gone and I’m free now and I can laugh and live and love more easily.
Happy Valentine’s everyone. If nobody loves you don’t worry, the greatest, most satisfying and fulfilling love you can ever find in life is the love for yourself so start there and all else will follow. Make yourself someone you can love, then you will find that you love life more and when you love those two things…yourself and life anything is possible.