100 Days of Healthy Habits

100 Days of Healthy Habits

I’m going to be following this avidly and joining in with my own resolve to spend at least 20 minutes a day dancing with my kids. it’s not huge but it’s better than sitting on the recliner eating chocolate.

If you’re stopping by and having a read of my blog even though it’s new and pretty boring so far, then why not join in with the 100 days of healthy habits too? Follow the link at the top of this post for more info.

 

Today… what I ate and how I feel

So today was the beginning. I checked out the scales and no, they won’t give me a reading, they say ERR. In other words I’m too heavy for them to work out how heavy I am. I’ll keep trying, maybe once a week to save me feeling disheartened on a daily basis.

I had some before photos taken. I was dressed in indoor slob clothes, mis matched, ill fitting, no make up, just a mess basically but this is what I am right now and I want to look at the before and after photos and not just see weight loss I want to see a new person, a fresh life, something totally different not just slimmer. I want to see a personality change, an outlook change and I think I can get that across in a photo. I don’t have the confidence to put them on here yet besides I want anyone reading this who has been there, is there or is going there a chance to imagine how I look based on my self descriptions and to have a slight sense of expectation about the changes that have happened. I want a bit of a shock factor. I hope this is the right way to go about this. I think it is based on something I’ve seen before, it worked for them and it worked for me in terms of inspiration.

OK so today I ate this for breakfast:

It’s just porridge, done on the hob, a mug of milk, half a mug of organic oats, a hand full of dried cranberries and dried apricots thrown in during the cooking to add some sweetness and then some more sprinkled on top. It was gorgeous. It was filling and it kept me going through to lunch no problems.

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I ate this for lunch (apologies for the blurred photo):

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I have a problem with portion size and I’m not tackling that yet, I eat a lot so rather than starve myself with tiny portions I’m eating huge portions of things that are good for me. It’s better than what I was doing before and I really do need those nutrients by the bucket load. I have a whole ton of free radicals that need blasting away that may have already done who knows what damage to my body. This was just layered up, started with shredded iceberg lettuce, sliced up some chunky cucumber a couple of nice big vine tomatoes, a big boiled beetroot, a hand full of chick peas, a red pepper, a tin of tuna in spring water (drained) and a swirl of very low fat mayo and a fresh lemon squeezed over the whole thing. It was delicious and I only managed half of it before I had to admit defeat. Maybe tackling portion size isn’t going to be so hard.

I’m putting all I know about healthy eating and weight loss into action here. I’m using lemon juice as a cleanser first thing in the morning but throughout the day too. There is a lot of cleansing to be done. I’m going for 10 a day with the fruit and veg and going for the rainbow approach of involving as many colours as I possibly can. I’m going very low on carbs right now. I know carbs are not good for me, they  boat me and do strange things to my bowel. For now they are more or less off the menu, but I did throw in a rye crisp bread for some fibre. I’m going to include beans and pulses where I can too. Including fish for the protein fix and peppers as well as other veg and fruit to form the free radical foot soldier brigade. I’m going substantial and slow burning for breakfast, even more substantial but carbless for lunch and for dinner I’m going smaller portions and a vitamin and mineral burst to surge through my insides  over night and start to heal me.

This was my dinner:

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I just peeled and chopped up a heap of fruit and threw some berries on top and that’s it. This was good to curb those TV watching munchies, it was handy being able to pick pieces up like sweets and far more refreshing. If I had some I might have thrown a probiotic yoghurt on this for the calcium fix and the good gut bacteria. I’ll have some tomorrow and I’ll have a different range of fruit and veg too.

I drank three pints of water with fresh lemon juice squeezed into it today and I’m going to have another before bed and I’m going to have a fruit tea, probably a peppermint one. So far so good. I already feel a little bit less stodgy and bloated. But I have noticed a temperature rise, I know that’s my body flushing out toxins, it happens when I juice too. It just shows how terribly unhealthy and ill my body is inside as well as out. I have a slight headache too but I know that will get worse over the next couple of days and then go away, that’s just something to do with going cold turkey on the chocolate and refined sugar intake.

See I know this stuff, I’m fat and lazy not stupid and ignorant. I wasn’t always like this, I used to be somebody else and I’m heading back to her. Sometimes people give me advice about diet and exercise and they don’t realise that if there is one type of person who knows what to do and what not to do when it comes to losing weight and being healthy it’s a morbidly obese person, we’ve been doing this for years, we know not only what works generically but what works specifically for us. We just need to get into the mental zone and we’re good. When someone comes up with an easy way to get into the mental zone and stay there then I’ll be all ears.

Stick with me, I’m doing this. Just like when I quit smoking nobody thought I’d do it and I did, cold turkey, quit first time 5 years ago. See I do have will power and wait until you get your first glimpse of me in 6 months time and you’ll see how much of an impact that will power will have had.

I just ordered some Kefir culture. This is how serious I am about this. I’m going to give it a go and see how I get on with it, I hear great things and will explain more when it all arrives and I start growing and ingesting the stuff.

Day One of Saving My Life

Sleep.

My sleeping pattern is screwed up.

I’m awake until 2 or 3 am every night. I have to wake up at 7 for work on weekdays (6 on a Thursday). What happens to me? I’m tired by 12 o’clock, lethargic, dragging my obese body around, overheating, my body clinging on to all of my fluids, making me swell, making me feel ever more uncomfortable. I fall asleep as soon as I get home.

I don’t have chance to speak to the kids to find out how their day was, I just collapse on the sofa and snore like an old man for a couple of hours.

I wake up and am too tired to cook, the vegetables, salads, fruits, lean meats and fish in the kitchen (they’re always there, fat people know what is good and healthy) get thrown in the bin AGAIN as a takeaway is called.

We throw away almost all of the weekly shopping in this way. Not only do I need a wake up call in terms of the waste of money… not only in discarded food but also in the cost of the takeaway, but I need a lesson in consideration. Consideration of people who are starving in this world, this country, this town, maybe even this street who would give their right arm for a pile of fruit and veg and fresh lean meats. I throw this stuff in the bin and instead call a greasy, calorie laden takeaway.

This isn’t good for me, it isn’t good for my kids and this has to stop and today is when it stops.

The first step in making it stop is not just in hauling my ass into the kitchen and cooking, it’s in getting my sleep pattern in check. Tonight I go to bed at 10pm. It should be easy as I’m always tired anyway and last night I stayed awake until 4am and didn’t even bother going to bed. You know what I was doing until 4am?

Playing Candy Crush. What is wrong with me? Seriously?

Now I am a teacher and I am also studying a post grad qualification and so I do spend a lot of time on the lap top studying legitimately, or researching for lessons or lesson planning or designing activities and class tasks. That wouldn’t be so bad, but that stopped at 10pm and I spent the rest of those 6 hours doing nonsense and most of them playing Candy Crush.

So yeah, that stops, I’m in bed at 10pm tonight, AFTER a dinner which I will cook of lean chicken grilled and placed atop a pile of steamed vegetables and followed by a fresh fruit smoothie. I’ll even take a photo to prove I did it and I’ll take a screen shot of my phone when I’m in bed.

How can I expect to find energy and will to do anything when my life is spent being exhausted and eating crap?

What example am I setting my kids?

It changes today. I will be in bed at 10pm and I will set my alarm for 7am Sunday. I will get up even though I don’t need to and I will start exercising. Tomorrow morning at 7am my new exercise regime begins.

It’s all under fire, the sleeping habits, the eating habits and the exercise habits. It has to be a three pronged attack. If I don’t get each one right, each one will fail, they all depend on each other to keep me on this road.

Water… water’s essential. It’s going to help me on this journey immensely. Today I start making sure I drink at least 8 large glasses of water. Tap water will do. No more coke, no more shite flowing through my system. I need to cleanse and clear out all of that crap that is inside of me and start to make a difference from the inside as well as the outside.

Breakfast today is going to be porridge and dried cranberries and apricots for sweetening. No refined sugar. Skimmed milk. No cream, no full fat anything. Those oats are going to roll through my system gathering up all of the rubbish that is stuck to my insides and taking it out the other end. Letting my body slowly absorb the nutrients offered by the mass of whole grains and fruits and the milk. Then I’m washing it all down and flusing it all out with water, water and more water.

This is the beginning and I’ll let you know on the day I start to feel better because of these small changes. I’m anticipating feeling more energetic, less sluggish, more rested, less tired, more mentally alert, more incentivised to move my fat self… let’s see if those things happen and if so, how long it takes for them to appear.

 

 

Saving My Life

I’ve come to realise at 46 and around 25 stone that it’s time to do something. I have children, I don’t want them burying me because I couldn’t take control of myself. I don’t want to miss out on anymore of life with them because I’m ashamed to go out in public.

I got this way through the usual excuses… illness, depression that’s true but on top of that heap laziness, denial and self induced depression because the fatter I got the more depressed I got.

Not any more this is going to be taken in hand and it all starts now… not Monday, not after Easter, but now.

I’ve always yo-yo’d throughout my life, I’ve never been anywhere near this big. 20 stone was a definite threshold I was never going over… but I did.

Don’t berate me, I hate myself enough already, I know what I am and what I’m not and I’ve got a response to any argument that says I’m a waste of space or an unworthy human so save it.

This blog is about me healing myself, because I am sick, this is a disease, I’m obese, morbidly obese and I’m doing something about it.

I’m going to map my journey and share my thoughts on how I got here and how I’m not going back and you might be surprised to find out things about me along the way, I’m not a stereotypical fat lazy sloth of a gal, I’m not ignorant, I’m not on benefits, I’m not a useless parent, I’ve not always been this way and I’m determined to not be this way for much longer.

I can’t find scales to weigh myself on so we’re not having a weight, I’m going to chart my journey in pictures but they will only be uploaded at the end of each 6 months, although I will take them every month. That can be my first target; to lose enough weight for the scale to cope with me then we can stop guessing and start using real  numbers. In the meantime we’ll chart my progress with physical changes I see and feel in myself, with comments from other people and in the improvement of my overall mental well being.

I have no long term target. I want to be fit and healthy and I want fitness to be a part of my life forever. If I was to set a long term target it would be to feel comfortable in a smart work suit and heels again and not feel like I was strapped into a straight jacket or that my arms had been surgically shortened due to the restriction of the fabric stretched across my fat back.

I want to wear a bra without it cutting into me and my fat spilling over the top. I want to move easily and not panic when I drop something on the ground. I don’t want to break into a sweat climbing one flight of stairs I don’t want to hurt from hauling my fat ass from the lounge to the kitchen. I don’t want to worry about waking up again in the morning when I go to bed at night and my kids finding me dead.

No one wants that, not even a fat lazy lump like me.

It starts now… I tell you more tomorrow.